Friday, January 21, 2011

Resolutions, Desolutions

Hot damn, it's already into a month of the new year.
Why does time have to run by so fast HURGHHH.

And so with every new year comes the ever so cliche resolutions that wetrysohardtokeepbutfindexcusestosortakindaforgetitpssh but ANYWAY... What the heck. It's 2011, so I'mma do 11 resolutions for meself.

I will;

1. Get my timing straight.
Accordingly, my sense of time is totally whack. I'm sometimes (okay, admittedly mostly) late for anything but classes and meetings (in which pisses everyone off ESPECIALLY when it involves food huh, Weiler and Athirahah? lol...), my own bodily clock is gonna be ticking time-bomb if I don't get my sleeping hours fixed from not sticking to my next resolution...

Pretty much, I have to stop leaving things to the last minute.

2. Procrastination? NASTY.
I will do assignments EARLY. I will and MUST do it even if I have to FORCE myself to get myself into the mood of doing anything. BE at places half an hour early and NOT be afraid of being alone, even if that's what I hate the most. Hell, it's only for awhile anyway.

3. Work hard, play hard.
To put my heart and soul into every aspect of my life: church, family, college, friends.
To not be afraid to sing and strum that guitar loud and proud during practice and during sessions.
To stop being petty, immature and just being plain horrible to my family, especially my brother.
To put not overlook any assignment as just an assignment but an opportunity to shine. To put thoughtful insights into every one of them and to look at the bigger picture, to look out of the box.
To keep in touch with the old and to gain the new, fearless.

4. Practice, practice, practice.
Art, guitar, singing; do gesture drawings everyday, doing little personal art farts everyday, practice the guitar at least 10 minutes a day, sing all those right notes, running those few rounds, actually being NEAT. Basically, just be a hella lot more hardworking at everything.

5. Write.
For an English nazi, it is essential to brush up and polish clean those skills. ;D
Therefore, planners, dream journals, budget books, and of course writing here more often, are to be my crucial mediums in this section.
Also with that, comes the sourcing, and thus, comes reading at least a page a day and going through a multitude of books. Not that THAT's gonna be a burden :)

6. Learn.
I've come to realize I'm afraid to make those mistakes. Afraid to mess up and make a fool of myself in front of others, even if I am still learning.
So in learning, I'm going to learn not to be afraid to take that fall, maybe break a leg or two and just have that courage.

7. Love.
This is going to be an especially long, tough personal journey for myself.
Most of my friends know that I've never been happy with my physicality.
I'm chubby and my face isn't what you would call pretty.

This time, I'm going to try to love myself.

It's not about finding excuses not to lose weight or bad hair days.
It's just to accept that my little differences and flabby loose bits are part of me and that confidence makes one attractive.

And hey, if I'm lucky enough, maybe find someone else who might just like that part of me too haha :D

8. Stop judgementalism.
I'll be honest, my perception of a person can be severely swayed when someone else blabbers their own personal opinion of them unto me. I make assumptions without hearing two sides of the story, and then spew out a mile-long list of supposed solutions that goes on and on and on and... Basically never reaches its end.

So. Actions speak louder than words, and I will see theirs for myself.

9. Stop thinking too much.
Not that it's not good, but too much of a good thing can be bad for you, right? Assumptions turn into big, long-winded stories, those stories then intertwine with your wildest imagination and then you realise it was just a figment of your imagination and you snap outta it. Cue Stress.

Therefore: avoid overly wild imagination to avoid stress.

(This only applies to real-life situations. If the aforementioned happens to my creativity then I shall consider myself a slab of dead meat of roadkill.)

10. Never say "I'm bored."
(Refer to resolution 4)

11. Just be happy :)
This year started so magically, it just seems like... Oh pah, need I say more?

So thereeee ya go. 11 things that I plan to keep not because I have to... But because I want to. And I really do want to see a better person in me.

(I hope I develop a sense of humour too.)



H.XD said...

YAYYYYY! Debbbieee! Finally an UPDATE on your blog! hahaha. Gosh. Can I share this list with you? Coz I really need it toooo! :O OMG. No. 9 is sooo true! It's what my lecturers tell me!